xtitsx: (poodle)
( 13 Jan 2017 11:28 am)
#1)
i sat down last week to write an e-mail to the guy who did my hair plugs.
Dr. Pineda in Manila, Philippines.
it had been eight months since i went an had Dr. Pineda cut a strip of TITS jerky off of the back of my head, pluck out the follicles of good, sturdy hair, then jab them into the front of my head, where my hairline was receding, back in April.
when i left his office all bloody and swollen back in April Dr. Pineda told me to keep in touch, to send an update and some photos about how my new hair was coming along.
eight months later, i did just that.
i told Dr. Pineda that i was really, really happy with the way my hair transplant worked out, that i was really glad i decided to do it and that he was the man to do it right.
i really am happy with Operation John Stamos.
my hair looks great now, at the front of my head, on top of my face, right where it is supposed to be.
i can't imagine having to walk around with my hairline in retreat like a fucking schmuck.
getting my hair plugs was one of the better decisions i've ever made.
i thanked Dr. Pineda and his staff for their excellent work, wished them a good Christmas and a prosperous New Year.
i also wished us both good luck with our new strong-man authoritarians that our countrymen have voted into office.
we're gonna need it.

#2)
i was adopted. y'all know that, right?
i was adopted at birth, i wasn't, like, in an orphanarium or anything like that.
my Parents wanted somebody to love and they paid good money for me.
several years ago i decided to send off a letter to the Happy Daisy Puppy Farm where my Parents bought me from to see what i could turn up about the woman from whom i came.
for curiosity's sake, not because i'm some kind of a fag looking to form a connection.
the Happy Daisy Puppy Farm was able to track down the woman who shat me out of her vagina, it turns out her name is Maria, and they agreed to pass on a letter from me to her.
seven months later Maria replied.
it was a nice letter and i promptly replied to her reply because i am the sort of person who replies to people. i think it is a matter of etiquette.
apparently my courtesy is not genetic and Maria never replied to my reply.
that was the end of our correspondence, back in September 2013.

every September since there has been a small part of me that hoped i would receive a birthday note from Maria.
i was born in September which she should likely remember because of the trauma it must have done to her vagina and September is when Maria chose to reply to my original letter, after several months.
but September 2014 came and went, then September 2015, then September 2016 and not a word.
every September i would get a wee bit dismayed, more offended then disappointed, but i consoled myself with having Parents who loved me and provided for me in their way.
i''m sure that Maria has other things to do then having to worry about dispatching a letter to some stranger she explicitly decided she didn't want anything to do with, she has a family, i understand, with two sons she decided to keep, but i find it hard to imagine that basic curiosity wouldn't rule the day in this situation.
i would love to get a letter from a stranger. any stranger, really.
i would love an opportunity to get to know somebody new.
i imagine that enjoyment and enthusiasm would be multiplied if there was also some kind of genetic commonality.
but, for reasons i cannot understand, it seems that Maria is not interested in me.
that's twice now.

i am not the kind of person who likes to impose myself on people.
i spent most of my childhood with only one friend at a time because i would rather be lonely then try to initiate anything with anyone.
it is a combination of introversion, awkwardness, arrogance and pride.
but, sometimes it is important to set pride aside and make a nuisance of yourself from time to time if the cause is good enough.
i figured if i shat a baby out of my pussy, i would be intensely curious about how that life turned out.
that's just human nature, isn't it?
i figured i had a lot to say about how awesome my life has been lately and i thought Maria might like to know about it.
throw it in the garbage if you want to, lady, but that would be a real sociopath move.

anyway, here goes my letter.
i wrote it on the computer because i think at typing-speed and then copied it out by hand, because that is more personal.
on the nicest stationary i had in my office, which isn't all that nice at all, really, but its better then standard white computer paper or lined legal pads.
-

Hello, Maria!
I hope you and your family had a good Christmas and I hope you all find the New Year joyful and prosperous. It has been a few years since we last corresponded so I thought I would take the liberty to dispatch another letter. Please don't feel any pressure to reciprocate. I am just the sort of fellow who enjoys writing letters.

The last time I wrote I was living in Austin, Texas with my Partner and our Dog, and working as an occasional substitute teacher. That was almost three and a half years ago. Things have changed since then. In early March, 2015 our beloved dog died. This was a sad moment for our family as we were very attached to her [and also because I guess we haven't known much hardship] but for the first time in nine years my Partner and I found ourselves with no responsibility so we took the opportunity to go travel around the world. We figured people only get a very limited window in which they are not tied down to anything and we might as well cash in on it while we still could, before another dog, or a baby came around and shackled us to our lives for another fifteen or twenty years.

On 1, August, 2015 my Partner packed up our life into two Volvo station wagons and drove east, to store our belongings in my Parents' house in New Jersey. We caught a flight from New York to Stockholm, the cheapest tickets we could find, and spent the next nine months tramping south then west, then east. We made our way through Scandinavia, the Baltics, Eastern Europe, the Balkins, Southern Europe, North Africa, the Middle East, and most of Asia. We were locked in the Belgrade Zoo after hours, slept under the stars [so many stars!] in the Sahara Desert and went scuba diving in the Red Sea. My Partner saw a moray eel, which I am jealous that I missed. We visited between three and six of the Seven Wonders of the World, depending on which list you are referencing and we missed major terror attacks in Istanbul and Hurghada, Egypt by a matter of days. We traveled frugally, hitchhiking and couch-surfing with friendly and accommodating locals as often as possible. Even if we had money to burn this would have been my preferred method of travel; getting to meet new people is at least half of the point. Though, perhaps there were one or two dodgy situations I might have opted to avoid if we had the means like the time we found ourselves in a part of India where they had never seen White people before and couldn't refrain from trying to touch us, or the time we stayed with a Moroccan hotel heir who had an enthusiasm for child prostitutes. The great majority of people we met on our adventure were wonderful, friendly, accommodating and kind, even in places where you would assume they wouldn't have any reason to be.

Towards the end of our great adventure my Partner and I made a stop in Manila where I underwent some elective surgery. This is relevant to you [or perhaps to your sons] because of the DNA we share. I have worn glasses since I was twenty-five. I was supposed to have worn them since the first grade, but the gold-rims with Smurfs on them embarrassed me and I never really needed them. My nearsighted problem did not manifest itself until my early twenties. I spent a few years driving around stubbornly wondering why they were making street signs harder and harder to read until I moved to Texas and the DMV wouldn't let me change over my license unless I consented to wear corrective lenses. After ten years of wearing glasses, I decided to do something about the underlying problem. Fortunately, I was a candidate for LASIC and, at a quarter-of-the price of the States, Manila was the place to have it done. After a week of my eyes stinging and being uncomfortably, I can now see like a normal person. Two days after I paid a doctor who didn't speak English to shoot lasers into my eyes I paid a different doctor for a hair transplant. My hair started thinning when I was twenty-five and my hairline receding a few years thereafter. It was my great embarrassment, as I am exceedingly vain. Fortunately, a Filipino doctor was able to carve out a strip of my hair from the back of my scalp and migrate the follicles up towards the front of my head where they could do the most good. The surgery was a success and I am much happier about the way I look. Hopefully, these are problems your boys can avoid with the luck of a different gene mixture, though, they say male pattern baldness is conferred on the mother's side.

My Partner and I returned from our Adventure in mid-May, 2016, flying from Beijing to Reno to visit my Partner's family for a few days, then back to New Jersey to collect our belongings. We would have preferred to stay out on the road a while longer, there is still so much of the world that we haven't seen, Australia, the Americas, Sub-Saharan Africa, but I was scheduled to begin my first semester at Law School in mid-August. Before we left on our Adventure I decided I would like to try my hand at lawyering. I have always been quarrelsome, especially with authority, and I figured I should try to put that antisocial impulse to some good use. I did not want to fall into the student loan trap, though, so I told myself I would only pursue a legal education if I could get one for free. I took a prep-class to learn how to take the Law School Admissions Test before we left on our adventure, then concerned myself with the application process from different places around the world where I could pick up wi-fi. I applied to fifteen different schools across the south-east [I do not enjoy the cold] and ultimately opted to attend the Texas A&M School of Law in Fort Worth, which is the highest-ranked school to offer me a full-tuition scholarship. I am now learning the laws at a school of agriculture and mechanics. It is no Harvard, but I cannot argue with the cost.

My hope is to one day practice in the area of constitutional law and civil liberties. My Partner and I had some minor experience suing the City of Reno for violating the 8th and 14th Amendment rights of her mother. The case went all the way up to the Supreme Court and, though we ultimately did not prevail, we changed the way police and jailers respond to suicidal threats all throughout the 9th Circuit. The whole process was exhilarating. If I ultimately I do not have the grades or good fortune to get into the civil liberties racket, I think I might also enjoy criminal defense. I can fight the prison-industrial complex by turning criminals back out on the streets, one at a time. Right now, though, I am content to concentrate on slogging my way through my classes. I have just completed my first semester and so far I have not failed out. Wish me continued success!

My Partner and I have settled into an apartment in Fort Worth and adopted ourselves another dog friend, a Shih Tzu / Yorkshire Terrier mix. She is the sweetest, most gentle, most loving dog I have ever met, though she has some emotional problems and does not like to be left alone. Fortunately, my Partner and I are homebodies and very rarely leave the apartment if we can avoid it. If I had my druthers my Partner and I would begin planing to have children in another year or two, though, my Partner is reluctant for several reasons. This may pose a problem in the future, having children is very important to me, but, that's an issue to fret about for another day.

I have taken enough of your time. Please forgive my interminable verbosity. I have enclosed a few photographs of myself for your interest. One pre-hair transplant at Aokigahara, which is a forest at the foot of Mt. Fuji that is suppose to be haunted [we saw no ghosts] and another from about six months ago when my new hairs were just growing in [with the new addition to our family on her very first day] and a more recent photo with my new hair finally grown in. I have also enclosed my address should you want or need anything but, again, please do not feel any obligation to reply. I am sure like most of us, life provides you enough to worry about without my intrusions.

Take good care,
TITS
-

//[onward ho!]
.

September 2017

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