xtitsx: (Default)
( 22 Feb 2017 09:10 am)
two Tuesdays ago was Valentine's Day.
the one day a year society tells us to appreciate our loved ones.
i celebrated by going to Law School.
i do not love anybody in Law School. the two people that i love stayed home.

i got out of Law School at the usual time and went out to my car to find a note tucked under my windshield.
“oh, what the fuck!?!” i said to myself, thinking some asshole had something stupid to say about me.
'why's everybody got to pick on me!?!' is my default expectation.
but, when i unfolded the note, wet from an afternoon rain, i could barely make out the PSE's handwriting “Hey Wild Thing! Happy Valentine's Day!”
the PSE had some errand to run Tuesday afternoon and she went out of her way to swing by the Law School to leave me a nice note.
thanks, sweet PSE!
i drove home smiling to myself.

back at the house the PSE ran out to the parking lot to greet me and help carry my bag inside.
she does this more often then not, because my bag is heavy and because getting out of a car is hard and because she is a good girlfriend.
Monster came out to great me, too because dogs like greeting their people.
we went up to the apartment, i sat for a few minutes petting the Monster and saying hello, then went to go get undressed.
when i went to go put my school books away in my office, i found that the PSE had decorated the little closet where i spend so much of my time.
there were red and pink crate-paper streamers and a banner that read “BE MY VALENTINE” with a bunch of hearts, all of which the PSE had cut out of construction paper and taped to some string.
above it all was a clear balloon that the PSE had crammed with a bunch of confetti and some kind of a hunk of something the size of a deck of playing cards.
“it's your present” the PSE indicated, then had me sit in my office chair below it.
i took a big ol' bayonet that came with my AK-47 and reached up, popping the balloon, raining down confetti and my present.
the PSE had managed to combine three of my favorite things, presents, confetti and stabbing.
thanks, PSE!
the deck of cards-sized present turned out to be a little flip-book that the PSE made.
the PSE had cut out several dozens of pictures of me so that when you flip through it, i'm a mud-monster at the Dead Sea in Israeli-occupied Palestine, staggering around.
the PSE had given me a gift featuring another one of my favorite things, myself!

the PSE's Valentine's Day production was impressive.
mostly because i didn't do a goddamned thing for her.
the PSE and i have a dodgy record of taking Valentine's Day seriously at best.
over the thirteen Valentine's Days we've had together, i would be surprised if we acknowledged more then three of them.
but, here the PSE was, putting in her time, thought and consideration into making me feel special.
the PSE woke up soon after i did and spent all morning while i was away at Law School putting together an arts and crafts production before she went off to run her errand.
it was a really sweet, touching act of love.
which i didn't even make an effort at attempting to reciprocate.
ordinarily, being sandbagged by thoughtfulness when i haven't done a damned thing that i am supposed to do would make me feel somewhere between shamed and resentful but this go-round just didn't have the time.
after laying on the floor for a while with the PSE and the Monster, appreciating her Valentine's Day production, it was time to get up and go sit in my decked-out office/closet to spend several hours working on school work.
that shit does not stop.

the PSE and i got into bed at the same time on Valentine's Day.
that doesn't happen often.
seven times in ten i will turn in for bed around 11:00pm by myself and the PSE will stay awake until 3:00 or 5:00 or 7:00am fucking around all night but this time, she was ready for bed when i was.
we got into bed and the PSE talked a bit about giving me a Valentine's Day BJ but in the end, she wasn't up for it.
she was too tired, she had a headache and her arms hurt for some reason.
i told her she could suck on my wiener some other time. i wasn't all that up for it, either.
Law School has pretty much killed what remained of our sex life after twelve-plus years, though, there wasn't all that much left to begin with.
maybe we'll get around to having sex one day, but for now, can we just shut the fuck up and go to sleep?
Happy Valentine's Day, PSE!!!

//[ab irato ad astra]
.

July 2017

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