continued from yesterday, a list of things i did over my Summer vacation from Law School...

Going To Different Grocery Stores:
the PSE, the Monster and i went to the Central Market up the street one day to do a big shop.
we got a bunch of coupons in the mail that our neighbors just throw out because we live in an apartment complex full of poor people and Central Market is an upscale store.
so, we took a family walk over to the Central Market to do a big shop and get $10 off of every $50 we spend, which is a pretty good deal.
the PSE has to think and plan out our meals for the week in advance which takes some time and some strategic thinking, but she works it out, which is impressive.
the best deal we got from our coupon haul was for over $24 worth of free sliced turkey deli meat.
i don't even really like turkey, sliced or otherwise, but i don't not like it enough to turn my nose up at it when it's free, so, for the next week we ate a whole shitload of turkey sandwiches.

on another occasion, i took the Monster for a walk to the Central Market to pick up sandwiches because the PSE was feeling hungry and lazy.
i am a sweet boyfriend, when i don't have anything else to do.

a different advertisement that came in the mail invites us to go to a different grocery store, Sprouts, that specializes in produce.
they advertised a great deal on fruits over one weekend especially pineapples, cherries.
the PSE planned on going to Sprouts alone one Sunday, but i wanted to go with her because for once, i didn't have anything better to do.
we decided to leave the Monster home alone because i think the people at Sprouts are bigger dicks then the people at the Central Market and the PSE didn't want to have to get into it.
besides, Monster needs to work on being left home alone.
our plan was to lock the Monster in her crate and sneak out, hopefully without her noticing our absence.
the Monster can take being locked in a crate just fine while we're home, even with us in the living room out of sight with the bedroom door closed.
so, we locked the Monster in her crate, then discretely got dressed in our out-cloths in the living room.
we put on a movie in the living room so she would think we were out there on the couch then quietly snuck out the door.
thirty-five minutes later we came home to see if our deception had any effect.
it did not. the Monster was still visibly distressed in her crate by our absence.
she couldn't' do any damage to out apartment being locked in her crate but still, why can't she just chill the fuck out!?!

to be nice, one day i went to the Wal-Mart by myself.
we needed to restock on all the stuff we use that they don't sell at the Central Market or the Sprouts.
normally the PSE makes the Wal-Mart runs but she wasn't up to it so i volunteered.
it was maybe my third or fourth time in a Wal-Mart in the past two years.
nothing has changed. that place is goddamned disgusting.

Being A Kitchen Helper:
-i did the dishes once, a full sink-load.
-i helped the PSE make banana bread because we had some fast-spoiling bananas we needed to put to good use.
-i helped the PSE make a batch of lemon sugar cookies, twice.
-i helped the PSE make garlic knots.
-i helped the PSE make red Thai curry with flank steak and a cucumber salad.
-i helped the PSE make matzo ball soup, cutting celery and onions and carrots and rolling the balls from a Manischewitz packet we bought in the 'ethnic' section of the Grocery.

Attending To House Chores:
now that i had the time i set myself to doing all the maintenance that our household needed that i couldn't do while i was in school.
the PSE could have done this shit at any time, but she didn't, because she is lazy.
-i fixed the shower curtain by duct-taping it back to the curtain rings.
-i painted over several Volvo trademarks on the PSE's Wagon with black nail-polish that had become viable again with wear.
-i ordered several canisters of pepper spray from the internet to replace our stores because i think the stuff goes bad after a while.
while i was on the weapons website i also bought a few sets of brass knuckles because you can never have enough of those laying around.
to give away as stocking-stuffers, or whatever.

Fucking The PSE:
i was going to put this one under the category above, but that seems mean.
we did it four times!
three of them were good.

Paying Up Debts:
i owed the PSE a foot rub because i lost a bet that Peter Dinklage was an American.
i though he was English, on account of how he sounds English all the time.
the PSE says that i owed her a back-rub from losing a bet about what the date was plus or minus six days.
i know that is a bet i definitely lost at some point, knowing the date is hard, but that was months ago and i am fairly certain that i paid it up already.
but, the PSE still had it on her ledger, so i paid up so she couldn't say i'm not a fair sport.

-

after a little less then two weeks, my vacation time came to an end.
i had to spend the last several days of my two-week Law School hiatus subjecting myself to medical procedures.
stay tuned for that tomorrow...

//[ab irato ad astra]
.

July 2017

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